Ep. 17/ Perceptual vs Receptual reality
“One’s work to do is to polish the heart So that all around can receive their love. anything else is selling stories of how they’d like to be seen.”
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So often we’re in the game of trying to master perceived reality. By that, I mean how we think people are supposed to see us. It’s not actually seeing us with their eyes, it’s a collection of stories that we want them to use as filters when they see us. I mean, to see us as we actually are would be blue eyes, mid weight, poor or excellent posture. That would be perceiving as someone is. But we aren’t as concerned about that. We’re concerned about the stories - good or evil / rich or poor / smart or dull / sexy or boring. And all of those are sets of stories used to create a perception, a narrative that we’d like them to read.
Now this time of year, the “festive season” we get to be with people who we’ve been selling and promoting these collections of stories to our whole life. That’s what makes gathering with these groups so unique.
You know it’s much easier to sell how you want or need to be perceived to someone who doesn’t have a lot of history with you. They don’t have the ebb and flow of years. They just see you now. And you say here I am, and they say “nice!” And it can be as simple as that.
But with longtime friends and family it gets multidimensional. This is why it’s a chance for advanced work. You say here I am and they say … hold on … there are these ancestral/historical/societal/religious lenses I can use … and that’s not who you were last year! Maybe this expression of you isn’t who I need to support me and my story. That’s not what makes me feel secure in who I’ve told you to tell me who I am. Humans love tacit agreements of stasis. We have an adoration for stability. That stability is built on as collective web of living stories. As your position of reality changes, they can feel that theirs is being affected too. This causes all sorts of emotions and reactions at the level of ego and identification. And so often ensues the dramatics of the holiday season. It’s a game of the mental and emotional trading and acceptance of stories. This is the realm of perceptual reality.
There’s another dimension to familial connection. That is the field of reception. This is related indirectly to stories of mind but come from the somatic wisdom of the heart and body. This is not an entry point through the analytical mind. This is somatic awareness. This simply is how they feel in your presence beyond stories. Whatever vibrations you hold inside of yourself, they’re receiving them. This is separate from the stories of the mind. Likewise they are presenting you with energies. The funny thing in polarity is that extremes are the same. If you both have opposing stories of righteousness, inside your energy is one, it’s the same - maybe anger or pride. The stories are different but the reception is the same. You’re both angry. Like created like. By using different stories or perceived reality you’ve become exactly the same energy in relation to each other.
The question on the spiritual path this time of year with family is can you be received instead of perceived. Can the energy and vibration you hold be that with which you wish to see reflected in all around you? Can you be authentically you not by who you say you are but by how much you are able to be love? Can you allow your heart to be the catalyst of change instead of the stories? Can you be engaged with the stories in a gentle and authentic way while inside you’re equanimous? What if they knew who you were by the way they felt? What if you couldn’t use words and the only way they could feel you was how you felt toward yourself? That’s the work we can do on the spiritual path. I can only work on myself. You can only work on yourself. BUT everyone around you will be affected by that work. It’s beautiful how it all works. Have fun this season. Focus on reception instead of perception and see what happens.
“WHAT IF OTHERS ONLY KNEW WHO YOU WERE BY THE WAY THEY FELT IN YOUR PRESENCE? AND THAT WAY, WAS ONLY HOW YOU FELT ABOUT YOURSELF? HEREIN LIES THE BEAUTIFUL WORK ON YOURSELF AS PART OF THE SPIRITUAL PATH.”
Bala
